Most Hilarious Reply to a Matrimonial Ad=20

Dear Madam:
I am an older young uncle living only with myself in Amritsar . Having seen=
your advertisement for marriage purposes, I decided to press myself on you=
and hope you will take me nicely.
I am a soiled son from inside Punjab . I am nice and big, six foot tall and=
six inches long. My body is filled with hardness, as because I am working =
hardly. I am playing hardly also. Especially I like cricket and I am a good=
batter and I am a fast baller. Whenever I come running in for balling, oth=
er batters start running. Everybody is scared of my rapid balls that bounce=
alot.
I am very nice man. I am always laughing loudly at everyone. I am jolly. I =
am gay. Especially ladies, they are saying I am nice and soft. I am always =
giving respect to the ladies. I am always allowing ladies to get on top. Th=
at is how nice I am. I am not having any bad habits. I am not drinking (onl=
y a Kingfisher in the evenings) but I am not sucking tobacco or anything el=
se. Every morning I am going to the Jim and I am pumping like anything. Dai=
ly I am pumping and pumping. If you want you can come and see how much I am=
pumping the dumb belles in the Jim.
I am having a lot of money in my pants and my pants is always open for you.=
I am such a nice man, but still I am living with myself only. What to do? =
So I am taking things into my own hands everyday. That is why I am pressing=
myself on you, so that you will come in my house and take my things into y=
our hand. If you are marrying me madam, I am telling you, I will be loving =
you very hard every day. In fact, I will stop pumping dumb belles in the Ji=
m. If you are not marrying me madam and not coming to me, I will press you =
and press you until you come. So I am placing my head between your nicely s=
melling feet and looking up with lots of hope.=20
I am waiting very badly for your reply and I am stiff with anticipation.
Expecting soon,
Yours and only yours,
Choudhary Bash Warraich,=20
born by mother in Bhindra di galli and become big,=20
and moneyed in Amritsar, Punjab

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